by Tom Drabble
A modern reworking of Jacques' Seven Ages of Man speech from Shakespeare's 'As You Like It'.
All the world’s a cake,
And all the men and woman merely tiers,
They have their fillings and their toppings,
And one tier in its time has many layers,
The first tier begins soft and absorbent,
A sponge with filling drooling out,
Barely any toppings,
Yet quickly rising,
The second tier ripe with bitterness,
Sweet lemon filling,
The topping hardened and reluctant,
But the insides soft and unknowing,
A tier next whose taste stays with you forever,
Delicious with an amazing blend of strawberry and,
Chocolate filling,
The tier that makes your heart rejoice,
The tier with the crust hardened by remorse,
And rejection,
Bland and tasteless it is the layer of shortbread,
Practical and easy to make yet can crumble at the,
Slightest touch,
A layer of disaster,
A mid-cake crisis,
Yet its job still done,
It fills tastier than the shortbread,
Now you’re full up-the final tier soon,
You carry on with a layer of toffee,
It’s tasty and relaxes you,
Ready for the end,
Now we are here,
The final tier,
A sponge the same as number 1,
Yet mere oblivion,
Sans taste,
Sans texture,
Sans topping,
Sans everything.
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